Category Archives: Love

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Love Rejoices When Truth Wins

Be A Truth Seeker, A Truth Speaker and Truth Lover

SYNOPSIS: Knowing and loving the truth may be the most difficult aspect of agape love to figure out in today’s American culture where the virtue of truth has been replaced with relativism. Propositional truth — something is either a) true or b) false — is rapidly being replaced by a version of an ever-changing truth that is based on an emotion of the moment, a current ideology, or a preferred perspective. From the top to the bottom of our leading institutions — government, media, business, and academia — as James” Russell Lowell presciently warned, “Truth forever on the scaffold, Wrong forever on the throne.” But as God-lovers, we must be truth-finders, truth-speakers, and truth-lovers! If we don’t pursue truth, as difficult, fatiguing, and confusing as that may be these days, we will know neither agape love nor be a conduit of it.

New Article: Love Rejoices With The Truth

Making Love Work // 1 Corinthians 13:6

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

Have you heard someone talk about “their truth” or say, “Well, that’s true for you but not for me”? There is a rare New Testament Greek word to describe that: BALONEY!

God defines truth, and He loves it. So should we. Here’s the Living Bible’s paraphrase of 1 Corinthians 13:6, “Love rejoices whenever truth wins out.”

This may be the most difficult aspect of agape love to figure out in today’s American culture where the virtue of truth has been replaced with relativism. Propositional truth — something is either a) true or b) false — is rapidly being replaced by a version of truth that is based on an emotion of the moment, or a current ideology, or a preferred perspective. From the top to the bottom of our leading institutions — government, media, business, and academia — as James” Russell Lowell presciently warned, “Truth forever on the scaffold, Wrong forever on the throne.”

But blurring the lines of truth hasn’t stopped at the doors of our institutions, it’s commonplace in our homes as well. Recent studies estimate that 60% of adults will lie on average three times within a ten-minute conversation. (https://brandongaille.com/24-nose-growing-statistics-on-lying/) Now there’s a great example we’re setting for our kids, wouldn’t you say!

Philosopher Blaise Pascal wrote, “Truth is so obscure in these times, and falsehood so established, that, unless we love the truth, we cannot know it.” As believers, for agape love to flourish in and flow from our lives, we must search out the truth in all things, as difficult as it is to find, and rejoice when it triumphs over that which is false.

A God-lover must be a truth-finder, a truth-speaker, and truth-lover! If we don’t pursue truth, as difficult, fatiguing, and confusing as that may be these days, we will not know agape love nor be a conduit of it.

God help us to find, know, speak, and love the truth!

Take A Moment: Antoine de Saint-Exupery said, “It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” Since we live in a world ruled by the god of this age, Satan, who is the master of deception, we would do well to question the veracity of most of what we say and told. That is not to suggest that we belligerently challenge everybody we meet to a truth duel, but we must pray for a loving but discerning heart. We must ask for the Spirit of truth to reside in our hearts. We must bathe our hearts in God’s truth. Moreover, we must become so familiar with the truth that the false is easily discernable. A good place to start is with a simple prayer for the Triune God of truth to fill your heart with his truth.

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Get Good At Letting Go Of Offenses

True Love Never Keeps Score

SYNOPSIS: If an altogether holy God, who cannot tolerate sin in His glorious presence, can forget our sins, then certainly we flawed human beings can forget the sins of our fellow sinners. In fact, if we want to be a conduit of God’s love on earth, we have to get really good at forgetting, as God does. Now, can an omniscient God truly forget our sins? No, but what He can do is choose not to remember them. And He does! How does He do that? He creates an unbridgeable chasm between us and our sins, according to Psalm 103:12. So, if God does that for us, then we cannot continue to be record keepers with those who are in our lives—we must become good forgetters.

Love Keeps No Record

Make Love Work // 1 Corinthians 13:5 (LB)

Love does not hold grudges and will hardly even notice when others do it wrong.

Are you a record keeper? Do you tend to hang onto past offenses, slights, and oversights? Are you one to nurse a grudge? Stop and think about how harmful that is—and not just to the one who has offended you, but to you. Unforgiveness is toxic. As someone has humorously but accurately put it, not forgiving another is like drinking rat poison … then waiting for the rat to die. Christ-followers are to be good forgetters. You see, true love learns to let offenses slip away like water off a duck’s back.

If an altogether holy God, who cannot tolerate sin in His glorious presence, can forget our sins, then certainly we flawed human beings can forget the sins of our fellow sinners. In fact, if we want to be a conduit of God’s love on earth, we have to get really good at forgetting, as God does. Now, can an omniscient God truly forget our sins? Of course not, but what He can do is choose not to remember them.

How does God do that? He creates an unbridgeable chasm between us and our sins, according to Psalm 103:12,

As far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.

Now if God does that for us, then we cannot continue to be record keepers with those who are in our lives—we must get good at letting go of those offenses, slights, and oversights. And one of the most helpful and motivating things we can do to achieve this impossible task is to think early and often about God’s forgetfulness when it comes to the sins for which we have repented. Slowly, meditatively, and gratefully read through these verses on God’s forgetfulness.

  • I will be merciful to them in their wrongdoings, and I will remember their sins no more.” Hebrews 8:12
  • I, I am he who blots out your transgressions for my own sake, and I will not remember your sins Isaiah 43:25
  • I will remember their sins and their lawless deeds no more. Hebrews 10:17
  • If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9
  • And no longer shall each one teach his neighbor and each his brother, saying, ‘Know the Lord,’ for they shall all know me, from the least of them to the greatest, declares the Lord. For I will forgive their iniquity, and I will remember their sin no more. Jeremiah 31:34
  • Come now, let us reason together, says the Lord: though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall become like wool. Isaiah 1:18
  • Repent therefore, and turn again, that your sins may be blotted out. Acts 3:19
  • Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32
  • Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. 2 Corinthians 5:17
  • There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1
  • He will again have compassion on us; he will tread our iniquities underfoot. You will cast all our sins into the depths of the sea. Micah 7:19

That last verse from Micah led to the Jewish tradition that thought of God as casting our sins into “the sea of forgetfulness.” While there is no mention of that in the Bible, it certainly is an appropriate and beautiful image of what God does for us. And that would be an appropriate and beautiful image of how we should treat the offenses of those who have sinned against us.

So, in light of that, if you are one to hold onto offenses, then stop. It is not the way of Christ! And for sure, it is impossible to be the source of God’s love to people while holding past offenses against them.

Remember, love keeps no record of wrongs!

Take A Moment: Your assignment today is to release those who have offended you and choose not to remember their sin from here on out. If you still struggle to do that after reading the verses above, then reflect on one more: “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” (Matt 6:14-15)

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Unselfish Love Is True Love

Loving People Don't Demand Their Own Way

SYNOPSIS: We live in an age of outrage. The grievance industry is alive and well. Say the wrong thing and you’ll get canceled. And if you think that’s outside the church, think again! Over the past few weeks, I’ve interviewed dozens of pastors from around the country who’ve told of too many heartbreaking stories of church members who’ve been ghosted, canceled, and met with hostility by other “believing” family members and church friends these past two years over politics, pandemic protocols, and cultural concerns. And all of them, like me, have personally experienced the same. What selfishness! Friends, this ought not to be in Christ’s family! Love—agape love—doesn’t ghost a friend or cancel a family member or express outrage when people don’t believe like you, vote like you, or please you. Love does not demand its own way.

Love is not selfish

Make Love Work // 1 Corinthians 13:5 (NLT)

Love does not demand its own way.

Love is not selfish. You would agree, right?

But think of the selfish nature of our current culture, not only outside but inside the church, which is supposed to be the family of God, characterized by followers of Jesus loving each other no matter what, being loyal to each other no matter what, expecting the best of each other, no matter what, standing their ground in defending each other, no matter what.

“Ghosting” a friend. Cancel culture. The age of outrage. If you think that’s outside the church, think again! Over the past few weeks, I’ve interviewed two dozen pastors from around the country who’ve told of too many heartbreaking stories of church members who’ve been ghosted, canceled, met with hostility by other “believing” family members and church friends these past two years over politics, pandemic protocols, and cultural concerns. And all of them, like me, have personally experienced the same.

What of Christ is there in that?

Friends, there’s no place for this in the Body of Christ. Love—agape love—doesn’t ghost a friend or cancel a family member. It doesn’t demand that people believe like you, vote like you, or live their lives to please you. Love does not demand its own way.

But if you have, I admonish you to repent before God and go to that person you’ve treated unlovingly and ask for their forgiveness. Listen: a friend is born for adversity (even adversity in the relationship), family loves at all times (even when you disagree over mandates or candidates), and unity in Christ is far more important than any temporal earthly concern (including current political beliefs).

Love never, ever demands its own way!

Love—agape love—doesn’t ghost a friend or cancel a family member or express outrage when people don’t believe like you, vote like you, or please you. Love does not demand its own way.

#afriendisbornforadversity

Take A Moment: Have you dismissed a friend recently? If you have, today would be a good day to say you are sorry, to God, and to that friend!

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Is Your Opinion A Conduit For Arrogance?

True Love Never Struts, Never Gets A Big Head, Never Bullies

SYNOPSIS: Are your opinions a conduit for arrogance? 1 Corinthians 13 reminds us that true love, the kind of love that emanates from God, the kind of love that Christ-followers are to model, is never arrogant. That is, it never struts, never gets a big head, and it never powers up on another. So, how does that play out in the real world of your daily life? Well, I’d say more practically than you’d think. For example, take how you express your opinions. The arrogance that fuels an uninvited, unhelpful, and often uninformed view plows right through the flashing yellow lights of human relationships without pumping the brakes, leaving a trail of relational wreckage — usually in the name of “speaking the truth in love.” And in this age of social media, where there are no flashing lights warning us of dangerous relational curves ahead, isn’t there a lot of that? Whether you are on the receiving end of another’s view, or you are giving your own, keep in mind that an opinion is not divinely inspired, and therefore it may or may not be the truth. And for sure, if offered without gentleness, respect, humility, and grace, it is not loving. True love knows when to speak — and to speak with gentleness, respect, humility, and grace — and just as importantly, when not to speak. Here’s the deal: You have a right to your opinion, but you don’t have a duty to share every thought that pops into your head. So, go ahead and have an opinion, but stay alert to the arrogance that 1 Corinthians 13:4 is calling out if you want to incarnate Christ-hearted love.

Make Love Work // 1 Corinthians 13:4 (HCSV)

Love is patient, love is kind. Love does not envy, is not boastful, is not conceited.

Check out these various Bible translations—each of them faithful to the original text—of the Apostle Paul’s rendering of the second clause of 1 Corinthians 13:4,

Love is neither anxious to impress nor does it cherish inflated ideas of its own importance nor does it cherish inflated ideas of its own importance. (J. B. Phillips)

Love doesn’t strut, doesn’t have a swelled head, doesn’t force itself on others, and isn’t always ‘me first.’ (Message)

Love doesn’t flaunt itself. (Modern English Version)

Now I have not been around too many braggadocious, mouthy egomaniacs—thank God—because this verse indicates that those kinds of people, no matter how they try to spin it, are not loving. Not like Jesus, anyway, which is the only kind of love the Christ-follower ought to pursue.

Yet I have been around a fair amount of believers who live with the opinion that their opinion is the only opinion that matters. And they are more than happy to share it—even if it is uninvited. And they do so without the slightest bit of self-awareness they are not obligated to share it, or that others’ opinions are equally worthy of sharing as their own.

I would say those kinds of people—and I hope you are not one of them … and if I am, I hope you will have the freedom to let me know (lovingly, of course)—have a love problem. Their need to share their opinions drags their “love” down into the category of boastful, self-inflated, needing to be impressive, strutting, me first, and flaunting. Listen to how The Passion Translation renders verse 4:

Love does not brag about one’s achievements nor inflate its own importance. (TPT)

So, here’s the deal: you have a right to have opinions, but it’s not your duty to share them in an unfiltered way. George Eliot warns of “always making [others] a ‘present’ of your opinions.” The arrogance that fuels an uninvited and unhelpful (and often uninformed) view plows right through the flashing yellow lights of human relationships without pumping the brakes, leaving a trail of wreckage—usually in the name of “speaking the truth in love.” Because it is an opinion, it may or may not be the truth, but for sure, it is not loving.

True love knows when to speak—and to speak with gentleness, humility, and grace—and just as importantly, when not to speak. Go ahead and have an opinion but stay alert to arrogance if you want to incarnate Christ-hearted love.

Why does the Apostle Paul feel the need to point out that love is neither braggadocious nor prideful? Simply because love is selfless, it puts others first, and it edifies the object it loves. Boasting and pride reveal a self-focus that belies corrosive insecurity and a spirit of scarcity. The famed preacher W. Graham Scroggie wrote,

Boasting is always an advertisement of poverty.

Make sure that early and often, you willingly put the people in your life ahead of you!

Take A Moment: The arrogance that leads to sharing your opinions in a way that harms your relationships—and your witness for Jesus Christ—is extremely hard to spot in yourself. So, if you have the strength and the courage—which I hope you do—give permission to two or three people whom you know to be loving yet honest to tell you the truth about you in this matter. As hard as it might be to hear what they say, remember, the goal is that you become a more loving person.

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Love Is Patient

Patience Takes The Courage Not To Be Disappointed

SYNOPSIS: In a season filled with division, anger, loss, confusion, and sadness, take a moment to reflect on John 3:16. This single verse reveals the whole Bible; a simple reminder that God transforming love is available to you through Jesus Christ: “God so loved the world” — God so loves you! Today, let God’s love lift you out of your sadness, flood your soul with inexhaustible joy, and set you on a path to the most amazing experience of life possible, which is being an uninterrupted, inextinguishable conduit of God’s love through you to those around you.

Love is patient

Making Love Work // John 3:16-17

“For this is how God loved the world: He gave[a] his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him.

Someone has rightly said that love is the most powerful force for good in the universe. Since that is the case, shouldn’t there be a lot more of it floating around these days? Sadly, that is not the case. Oh, there is evidence of love here and there, but much of the world is not saturated in it. And frankly, that can be quite discouraging.

For that reason, I would encourage you to take some time this week to reflect on the highest, most dynamic force of love in existence: God’s love. In this season filled with division, anger, loss, confusion, and sadness, take a moment to reflect on the greatest proclamation of God’s love ever made—John 3:16-17,

This is how much God loved the world: He gave his Son, his one and only Son. And this is why: so that no one need be destroyed; by believing in him, anyone can have a whole and lasting life. God didn’t go to all the trouble of sending his Son merely to point an accusing finger, telling the world how bad it was. He came to help, to put the world right again. (The Message)

This single verse reveals the whole Bible; a simple reminder that God transforming love is available to you through Jesus Christ: “God so loved the world” — God so loves you!

Today, let God’s love lift you out of your sadness, flood your soul with inexhaustible joy, and set you on a path to the most amazing experience of life possible, which is being an uninterrupted and inextinguishable conduit of God’s love through you to those around you.

But let’s take it a step further and describe what the Bible says God’s love flowing through you to others ought to look like. Nowhere is there a clearer, more compelling description of what God expects His love to look like as it is translated through your life than in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7,

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

Once a week over the next several weeks, I want to break Paul’s description of love down word-by-word, beginning with this: Love is patience.

Have you lost patience with difficult people in your life lately? Are you fed up with what’s become of your church in these exhausting days of Covid-19 regulations? Are you discouraged by godless and incompetent leaders ruining your nation? If you are, then join the very large and growing company of the impatient.

But listen, God’s plans for the people in your life, His purposes for your church, and His timing for dealing with this evil world are in His control—not yours. If for no other reason, that’s why you need to practice patience. It’s really a matter of your trust and obedience to God. Paulo Coelho notes, “The two hardest tests on the spiritual road are the patience to wait for the right moment and the courage not to be disappointed with what we encounter.” Yes indeed—trust and obedience is the secret sauce to gaining and maintaining patience. Said another way, Luc de Clapiers observes,

Patience is the art of hoping.

So put your hope in God (Psalm 42:5) by making the deliberate choice to be a continual conduit or His patient love.

That will not be an easy assignment, but the God of love is counting on you to be patient love’s exemplar.

Take A Moment: With whom has your love grown impatient? You can begin to reclaim patience in that relationship by praying for them more than you gripe about them, and by specifically lifting up offerings of gratitude for them.